This Deep Tissue Massage Gun Might Be Better Than a Theragun (and Cheaper!)
I mentioned in Wear, Watch, Want #166 that Theragun’s constant targeted advertisements had gotten to me, and i wanted a Theragun of my very own. And… I didn’t get one. A Theragun I mean. I got a Sharper Image Deep Tissue Percussion Pro Massager, and it is GREAT.
After scoping out at least a dozen knockoff Theraguns on Amazon (too many, too confusing!), calculating how much savings I could get in Theragun’s Black Friday sale (not much!), and wondering if one of these massage guns would be any better than the pain relief tools I already have (Wirecutter says no! I ignored them!)… I gave up. I still wanted one, but I didn’t want to pay hundreds of dollars, or get a cheap one that I’d end up needing to replace, or research more and more products that all seemed the same but also different in ways I didn’t understand. I was looking to relieve pain and stress, not get more. Then I was in Costco, doing my favorite thing: Walking down every aisle and looking at all the weird stuff I don’t need, and also the weird stuff I cannot live without (I used to do this with a big ol’ Starbucks in my hand, and I’d sip and stroll and browse and now it is but one more simple pleasure exterminated by Covid). I passed by a display for this knockoff Theragun, and it all looked pretty good. Six different attachments, six speeds, long battery life, quiet, and all contained in an included carrying case. For $100! Plus, it’s Costco, which has a return policy rivaled only by Nordstrom. I consider every Costco purchase risk-free, because you can bring back anything for any reason. So I bought it.
It all fits in this carrying case, which is super convenient. The case itself is pretty low profile, and I even took it to my parents’ house for the week (and never had to charge it, that battery life is no joke). When you open teh case…
There’s the gun itself (there needs to be a better word for this than ‘gun’ or ‘massager,’ both of which give me the creeps), and the smaller case-within-a-case that holds all the attachments, and even a spot for the charging cord.
It also comes with a little pamphlet that explains what each of the attachments is best used for, and how deep the pressure is from each one. This is an invaluable resource, because some of these attachments are inscrutable on their own. My favorites, if you’re wondering, are the big ball and the flat bumpy one.
The massager (ugh) itself is super easy to use. There’s a switch on the bottom so you don’t accidentally run down the battery, and then one button on the back that you press to turn it on and select your speed. It starts at 1, the slowest, and you just press the same power button again to go to 2, 3, etc. After 6 it goes to zero, which is off, but if you hold the power button for a few seconds it will go to zero, no matter what speed setting you’re on. The speed will be displayed for a few seconds, but then the display will change to the percentage of battery power you have left.
The massager weighs about 4lbs. I’m not entirely sure, but it’s not so heavy you can’t pick it up and move it around. It feels nice that it has some weight to it. Do you know the story about Beats headphones? They are actually very lightweight, but when people tried them they thought they were too expensive for something that was so light, so the manufacturer put weights in them to make them feel more expensive. This might be case with this massage gun (double ugh), and if it is then market research is RIGHT because I would think this was a piece of crap if it weighed less. It would also jump around a lot when you turned it on and put it on your bod. It needs a little heft so you don’t just have a bouncing jackhammer on your shoulders.
It’s also quiet! I have used this thing while i watch TV and it didn’t affect the experience at all. The packaging says it’s “whisper quiet” and I think that’s a bit of a stretch - you can definitely hear it - but you can have a conversation or watch TV or listen to a podcast and won’t have the sound of this pummelling machine get in the way.
Overall, if you have aches and pains, or are missing your regular massage therapy appointment during lockdown, or just want a weird punching gadget, this could be the perfect solution for you. A massage gun, six attachments, AND a carrying case? For $100? AND it’s at Costco, so you can pick it up when you’re stocking up on bananas and protein bars!
